Mr Twit rides again

Mr Twit rides again

1_DanGermain_MrTwit (1)Written by Dan Germain, illustrated by Ruby Germain
Inspired by The Twits

 

Mr Twit wheehoozelled his way through town on his bike. Young people sat outside cafés, drinking strange green drinks, and seemed to be enjoying them.

“Mmm, pond slime,” thought Mr Twit enviously.

Then it struck him. These people – they looked like him. They had straggly beards. They wore raggedy trousers. And they drank weird drinks, full of algae and grass clippings.

His mind rumbled. His heart grumbled. His temper soared like a dirty vulture.

“What, in the name of all that is filthy, is going on?!” screamed Mr Twit.

“Everyone seems to have turned into me!”

Read more…

 

 

Veruca Salt

Veruca Salt

veruca-saltBy Ceri Tallett, illustrated by Vera Lily Palacio-Knight
Inspired by Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

 

Spoilt girl. Has everything. Wants more.

Golden tickets. Only five. Chances slim.

This time. Fate grins. Wonka watches.

Nut Room.

Magic squirrels.

Veruca wants.

Veruca grabs.

Oh dear.

Squirrel ambush.

Down hole.

Bad Nut. 

Stealing things is never bright,
So heed this warning those who might:

People who steal magic creatures,
Always gain unsightly features.

A tail, some trotters, a warty snout.
Traits you’d rather do without.

Sentenced to gnawing habits,
Of hamsters, beavers and rabbits,

Miss. V. Salt joined the nibguzzler crew,
And like them, must forever chew.

So beware of thieving ways,
Remember – squirrel pinching never pays.

 

Read the feature story ‘The hunt for the Nibguzzler’

A FOX-CEPTIONAL Feast

A FOX-CEPTIONAL Feast

Mrs Fox (1)Written by Bridget Waters, illustrated by Athalia McIntyre
Inspired by Fantastic Mr Fox 

 

Serves two Large Foxes, four Small Foxes and 26 (somewhat unexpected) guests.

Darlings, take three plump juicy hens. Plucked. Four young ducks, lovely and fat. Three of the finest geese. A side of bacon. And three magnificent hams.

Smother everything in goose fat. Roast, basting regularly.

For the vegetarians? Let’s not make a fuss. Gently simmer ten bunches of carrots in lightly salted water.

Meanwhile, hollow a large dining room out of the earth. Construct a dining table and chairs to seat 32. Make sure guests don’t eat each other.

MY HUSBAND IS A FANTASTIC FOX.

And me? I’m FOX-CEPTIONAL.

 

Mr Fox

Mr Fox

MrFox

Written by Andy Hayes, illustrated by Millie Hayes
Inspired by Fantastic Mr Fox

 

Mrs Fox used to call me Fantastic Mr Fox. I was a magnificent creature: from my sharp, white teeth to my neckerchief, but please – don’t mention my tail.

I had outfoxed the farmers, Boggis, Bunce and Bean. We thrived under ground as they shivered above us. We were happy, but good things never last. Mr Badger called me a show-off. We fought, I won, but hurt the poor chap in the process. The others started looking at me with fear in their eyes. They scuttled away whenever I came around. So I felt it was time to move on.

Read more…

 

Read the feature story ‘Mr Fox, meet Millie and Me

The Queen does a great big whizzpopper

The Queen does a great big whizzpopper

4_AmnaBoheim_TheQueenWritten by Amna Boheim, illustrated by Lara Boheim & Alexander Kivinen
Inspired by The BFG

 

“I’ve given it a twist,” the BFG whispered to Sophie.

“You did what!?” Sophie whispered back.

The Queen peered at the Frobscottle bottle. “One is 90 only once.” She then drained the whole bottle. “One would love to have another.”

“I really don’t think you should,” said Sophie.

About to argue, the Queen let out a thunderous whizzpopper. The walls of Buckingham Palace shook as Her Majesty shot up to the ceiling, spun around the ballroom, royal bloomers on show, before landing spread-eagled by Sophie and the BFG’s feet.

The Queen beamed at them. “The most scrumpilicious birthday present ever!”
4_AmnaBoheim_TheBFG

 

Read the feature story

The Cementa-Gum Blandy-Grippers Get the Grown-Ups

The Cementa-Gum Blandy-Grippers Get the Grown-Ups

DahlWritten by Amanda Edmiston, illustrated by Allannah Edmiston
Inspired by Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

 

Elastiliciouscementa-tongue,
Gobbo-smatterbubble-gum,
Guzzletubelet-weenyanbig,
Plasti-coated-bellymajig.

Bubble-blowing day and night,
Secretly. Out of mum’s sight!
Swapping gum for organic-goo,
(apparently it’s good for you!)

Masticating, unperturbed,
Jaws expanding, it’s absurd:
Grown-ups banning chewing-gum.
(What’s mum know? Her waistline’s done!
Teeth jet-black, face indigo-blue,
clearly greens just make you poo…)

Chewing-gum-meals, that’s the way
For children to get five a day!
My long, thin dad bans TV
My mum yells: “Gum’s not for tea.”

Her downward-dog whilst blitzing fruits
His endless walks in hiking-boots.
All I want’s chewing-gum
Can’t they see their life’s NOT FUN.
Childhood’s just so hard
when you’re Scarlett Teavee-Beauregarde.

 

Read the feature story here.

Prince Pondicherry

Prince Pondicherry

princepondicherry_harryhughesWritten by Jayne Workman, illustrated by Harry Hughes
Inspired by Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

 

“C’est comme ça, dear Wonka,”
Purred the Prince over chai,
“A tribute in chocolate just to me?
How delicious, delightful, chocaudacious to see.”

 

“Pondy, good fellow,” breezed Wonka right back,
“Un palais de chocolat? Ça ne va pas.
In the Indian sun, it’ll melt in a trice.
That’s it. Final word. Chocolate Master’s advice.”

 

“Choco carpet, choco taps, choco turrets, choco baths.
What’s wrong about that?
You say it won’t work. Your name’s on the line.
No sugar for you. Our trade, I resign.”

 

“Oh, but wait, Your ‘Cherryness, let’s not despair.
Dark or light chocolate for the patio chairs?”

 

Read the feature story ‘Harry and the mystery of the chocolate palace

Grandmama’s Devious Plan

Grandmama’s Devious Plan

Grandmother's-Plan-Cover---Written by Florence Massey, illustrated by Chris Harton
Inspired by The Witches

 

We started strong in England,
So now I’ve a witch map and a plan.
Luke and I, we’re totally ready,
To take on the whole vile clan.

The Grand High Witch lives in Norway,
And we know that she’s been plotting too.
She’s invented an itchless wig,
And the Squointy Shoe.

But she’s got a big fight to face.
At her castle, plagued with bats,
We’re beginning our battle;
Formula 86 – and 50 cats.

Because, my darlings, you see,
The War on Witches has only just begun.
We must take countries of them down,
Slowly but surely. One by one.